Daily Show Prep - Tuesday July 31, 2018

• Frustrated Republicans tread carefully around Trump's shutdown tweets
• Dick Turbin demands DHS sec. step down over 'humanitarian disaster' 
• Pay gains rose at fastest rate since 2008
• Weather-related disaster losses down globally
• The great greenhouse gas theory fail
• CNN upset conservative outlets aren't asking Trump about Cohen
• Portland police refused to help ICE agents who called 911
• Academic journal duped by author of 'dog rape culture' article
• Oregon congressional candidate tweets lewd tweet about first lady
• Trump blasts the Koch brothers: 'Their network is highly overrated'
• LA prosecutors decline sex abuse charges against Les Moonves
• UGA dean attacked on Twitter for having a Republican friend
• Boycott looms for historic Boston hall because namesake owned slaves
• Twitter suspends GOP senate candidate for using Twitter's own recommended content
• Rich Lowry: America is seriously debating socialism
• Newspaper employment down nearly 25 percent in nine years
• 49ers' Richard Sherman says Cowboys' Jerry Jones has a 'plantation mentality'
• Alex Jones faces 5 defamation lawsuits
• 'Extreme embalming' poses dead people like they're alive
• Saudi man arrested after he kissed his girlfriend on the cheek
• Transexual mutilates himself to become reptilian
• Guest: Killer Beaz on his new project, The Comedy Buzz
• Expert of the Day: Doug Pollack from ID Experts on Facebook users being concerned about their privacy

Daily Show Prep - Monday July 30, 2018

• Jonathan Turley: Cohen flipping puts Trump 'one witness away' from catastrophe
• Longing for the good ole days? Read this
• Trump, NY Times publisher clash over 'fake news'
• NY Times picks token conservative columnist because he hates Trump
• And they wonder why they're called fake news: NY Times fantasy of Trump loss in 2020
• CNN's Acosta frets conservative outlets might pitch softballs to Trump
• Trump hails Illinois steel mill as economic success story
• Liberals bemoan 'You can't eat GDP'
• Another brawl at Trump's Hollywood star
• Top TN Dem official calls Trump supporters 'idiots'
• DNC chairman travels with an $1,800 bag after calling socialism 'future of our party'
• Sen. Cory Booger is sounding like Mad Maxie
• 'Medicare of all' projected to cost $32.6 trillion
• Russia sold off U.S. Treasury securities in run-up to Helsinki
• Twitter hires leftist college professors to monitor hate speech
• UVa refuses to revoke appointment of former Trump aide
• Taxis strike in Spain, clog traffic over Uber
• Stormy's lawyer thinks somebody's stalking him
• More than 1,000 people have already downloaded plans to 3-D print AR-15
• Cowboys' Jerry Jones told by NFL to stop talking about anthem
• Big Mac turns 50

Daily Show Prep - Friday July 27, 2018

• GDP up 4.1 percent
• Trump suggests 8 or 9 percent growth if we cut trade deficit
• Mikey 'The Rat' Cohen claims Trump knew in advance about DJTJ/Russian meeting
• Expert says no 'smoking gun' of Trump campaign finance violations in secret tape
• Mueller and DJTJ spotted at the same gate at Reagan National airport
• Twitter follows Facebook, down 14 percent
• Facebook bans Alex Jones for 30 days
• CBS CEO Les Mooves latest scalp for #MeToo
• Ecuador's president says Julian Assange must leave their embassy
• Brawl breaks out at Trump's Hollywood star
• Swedish roads will charge electric cars
• Person who call 911 after Demi Lovato's heroine overdose said 'no sirens'
• Two Iraqi jetliner pilots break into fight mid-flight
• Drug smugglers put bounty on drug-sniffing dog's head
• Man indicted for threatening to kill Rep. Diane Black

Daily Show Prep - Thursday July 26, 2018

• Paul Ryan against effort to impeach Rosenstein
• Jim Jordan to run for House Speaker
• LWM putting all their hopes in Mikey 'The Rat' Cohen
• 'Significant' witness in Cohen probe revealed
• Ocasio-Cortez says Trump's policy on immigration is similar to ethnic cleansing
• Mad Maxie calls for 'street rage' against Trump
• LA Times asks if Trump resistance goes too far
• Portland to pay unknown costs to clean up Occupy ICE camp
• Iranian general warns Trump 'we will destroy everything you own'
• Twitter 'shadow banning' conservatives again
• Facebook stock tanking, shareholders plot coup against Zuckerberg
• Urban heat island causing heat records, not global warming
• Most Pacific islands are growing rather than shrinking
• Dem congressional candidate wants to tax 'irresponsible breeders'
• Disney to do away with plastic straws
• Muckrakers: NY Times targets Kavanaugh's wife looking for dirt
• Stormy's lawyer is testing the presidential waters in Iowa
• DEA seizes $29,000 in cash from man for no apparent reason
• IRS spent $20mil on debt collectors that only collected $6.7mil
• Wisconsin ordered to pay for gender reassignment because of Obamacare
• Papa John suing Papa John's
• 'Borat' strikes again in small Arizona town
• Artists plot tour in opposition of Trump's immigration policies
• 'Burned-out' millennials are quitting lucrative jobs
• Zoo accused of painting donkeys to look like zebras
• Survey: Average person has just 15 perfect days per year
• Activists demand more social justice in Medieval Studies
• Gross Alert! Woman eats food out of urinal to prove it's cleanliness
• Expert of the Day: Vinnie Vernuccio from the Mackinac Center for Public Policy on the unions skimming Medicaid funds

Daily Show Prep - Wednesday July 25, 2018

• Trump says EU blinks on tariffs
• CNN plays leaked Trump-Cohen conversation, Giuliani says nothing to see here
• Cohen's lawyer says only mobsters and drug dealers pay in cash, yet Trump says 'Don't pay in cash'
• The mystery over 'Charleston' mention in the Cohen tape
• Dem congressman suggests Trump 'pee tape' is real
• GOP intel chairman says there were 'sound reasons' for warrant on Carter Page
• Obama knowingly funded al-Qaeda affiliate
• Jim Gossett's parody song 'Flipper'
• Police clear out Occupy ICE camp in Portland
• ISIS claims Toronto attack
• Chris the Lizard from CNN thinks Trump saying the 'fake news' is lying is 'terrifying'
• CNN whines about reporter being banned from press conference
• Idiot Ga. GOP rep resigns after dropping pants on 'Borat's' TV show
• Another liberal with TDS destroys Trump's Hollywood star
• Maxine Waters thinks she's been sent by God to destroy Trump
• Underground lake discovered on Mars

Daily Show Prep - Tuesday July 24, 2018

• Trump to bail out farmers hurt by tariffs
• Farm groups praise the bailout
• NY guv wants to bail out NY Daily News
• Comey says he didn't know who funded Trump dossier yet certified that he did to get Carter Page wiretap warrant
• Obama intel chiefs gave Russia a pass and now blame Trump
• Networks' coverage of illegal immigration 92 percent negative against Trump
• 22 percent of population does not speak English at home
• Bob Corker  threat to revoke security clearance 'a banana republic kind of thing'
• Israel shoots down Syrian war plane
• Portland food cart closes due to threats from Occupy ICE protestors
• Denver Post runs letter to editor suggesting Trump should be executed
• LWM go nuts over Sessions saying 'Lock her up'
• Disney facing backlash for firing 'Guardians' director
• Report: Christians in China face increased violence
• Texas and Florida see largest population gains
• Joe Theismann: Indians 'seem to be OK' with Redskins name
• Man arrested for exercising naked at Planet Fitness
• Deep Blue is largest shark ever caught on camera
• Expert of the Day: Dr. Paul Nathanson on 'theybies' and other nuttiness from those who want to let their children choose their own gender

Daily Show Prep - Monday July 23, 2018

• FISA apps confirm: FBI relied on bogus Steele dossier
• FISA warrant application supports Nunes memo that FBI withheld info from court
• And, of course, 'Morning Ho' attacks Nunes for attacking the FBI
• Rand Paul to ask Trump to revoke security clearance of ex-CIA director Brennan
• And Trump just may take Sen. Paul up on it
• Republican proposes carbon tax. Yes, a Republican.
• Iran threatens Trump, Trump threatens back
• Iranian general says Trump 'won't dare' take military action against Iran
• Judges deals blow to Mueller in Manafort case
• 'Controversy' erupts over lawn care business card saying they don't hire illegals
• Woman loses 9 family members in Missouri duck boat tragedy
• What the heck is Hillary wearing?
• One-third of nation's largest newspapers have suffered layoffs since 2017
• NY Daily News slashes half its newsroom staff
• Chicago mayoral candidate hands out money to voters
• JPMorgan Chase CEO is worried about income inequality, infrastructure
• Experts say we're at risk of losing control of of AIDS 'epidemic'
• Yet this 'epidemic' is not even on the top 10 list of deadliest diseases
• Ga. house member under fire after dropping his pants on TV show
• Papa John's is worried Papa John will try to take over company
• Facebook mocked for removing 400-year-old topless Jesus painting
• Facebook blocks links to women's rights group over complaints of 'transphobia'
• Tom Brady body-shamed on social media
• Study: Average kid spends just 7 hours a week outside
• Expert of the Day: Eddie Scarry from the Washington Examiner on how Trump's European tour wasn't what the media said it was

Daily Show Prep - Friday July 20, 2018

• Three top cybersecurity officials leaving FBI
• Trump's lawyer secretly taped conversation about payment to Playboy model
• Mueller now going after Roger Stone's 'madam'
• Sharpton teases interview with Cohen
• Obama chides Americans for having too much before heading back to his $8 mil mansion
• Seventeen dead after boat capsizes in Missouri
• Republicans pick Charlotte for 2020 convention
• Scores more sick from McDonald's salads
• More Americans are drinking themselves to death
• Report finds surprisingly high numbers of slaves in developed countries
• Ecuador to hand over Assange to UK
• Americans can legally download 3-D printed guns starting next month
• HuffPo claims Rep. Steve King is a white supremacist
• Kimberly Guilfoyle is leaving Fox News to campaign with boyfriend DJTJ
• Why are thousands of Teslas sitting in a field in California?
• Study: Doctors listen to patients for just 11 seconds before interrupting
• Dad delivers wife's baby in bathroom at Chick-fil-A
• George H.W. Bush's former cardiologist killed in bicycle drive-by shooting
• Fox's John Roberts follows NYT columnist's lead, pulling back from Twitter
• Disney cuts ties with 'Guardians of the Galaxy' director over past sick tweets
• Expert of the Day: Colin Hanna from Let Freedom Ring on Kathy Kraninger to head the CFPB

Daily Show Prep - Thursday July 19, 2018

• Trump hints of second meeting with Putin, calls fake news media 'real enemy of the people'
• Exhibit A of Fake News Media: Outline claims Russian spy found in Oval Office photo, turns out to be White House staffer
• John Brennan once voted for a commie for president
• Miami Dolphins may suspend players who violate anthem rule
• House Dems roll out 'For the People' slogan
• Here come the commies: Ocasio-Cortez pulling the Dems even further left
• Trump on push to abolish ICE: 'Democrats have a death wish'
• PJ Media upset that shopping center is photographing license tags for ICE
• New Jersey considers new tax on tap water
• People go nuts when Zuckerberg defends free speech, even Holocaust deniers
• San Fran mayor won't crack down on people crapping on sidewalk
• TEDx speaker says 'pedophilia is an unchangeable sexual orientation'
• Rapper brags about crimes on YouTube, gets sentenced to jail
• Doctors warn anti-anxiety pills could be next drug epidemic
• Liberal actor shamed into apologizing after complimenting Ben Shapiro as 'genuine person'
• Tim Allen dings ABC in new teaser for 'Last Man Standing' coming to Fox
• Expert of the Day: Steven Nelson from the Washington Examiner on news outlet claiming redheaded Russian spy spotted in Oval Office photo that turns out to be a White House staffer

Daily Show Prep - Wednesday July 18, 2018

• Report: Lisa Page says higher-ups at Bureau covered up Chinese hack of Hillary's e-mails
• Comey urges Americans to vote Democrat in the mid-terms
• Sanders disputes that Trump said Russians no longer meddling
• Hysterical Dem senator calls Russian election meddling 'a 9/11 moment'
• Dem (Dim) Congressman suggests military coup to remove Trump
• Bookmakers increase odds of Trump impeachment after Helsinki
• Facebook finally removes page inciting violence against Republicans
• Ocasio-Cortez calls for occupation of airports, ICE offices
• San Fran issues voter registration forms for non-citizens
• MGM Resorts sues victims of Vegas shooting to limit own liability
• Accused Russian agent tried to trade sex for influence
• ISIS and Taliban terrorists are blowing each other up in Afghanistan
• Weinstein asks judge to throw out Ashely Judd lawsuit, says she was 'nightmare' to work with
• Elon Musk apologizes for calling Thai cave rescue diver 'pedo guy'
• Teens glued to phones risk rise in ADHD symptoms
• Study: Conservatives find more meaningful lives than do liberals
• How student loans are making some people abandon their dreams (poor babies)
• Player calls police during pickup basketball game because he got fouled
• Expert of the Day: Dr. Tim Ball, author of 'Human Caused Global Warming: The Biggest Deception in History, on the latest heatwave

Daily Show Prep - Tuesday July 17, 2018

• Trump clarifies his remarks from Helsinki
• Back in DC, Trump under pressure to reverse course on Russia
• CNN is disturbed by these lines from Trump's press conference
• Fed: Economy growing 'considerably stronger'
• Lisa Page says anti-Trump texts with Strzok 'mean exactly what they say'
• GOP rep says Page's testimony has 'significant differences' from Strzok's
• What did Uncle Phil tell ya? Lisa Page may seek immunity deal
• Is Peter Strzok Agent 007, or soon to be Inmate 007?
• Young Republicans kicked out of Uber car, told 'welcome to the resistance'
• Chicago may try Universal Basic Income
• The real story about Papa John and the N-word
• Doubt creeps in about Elon Musk's leadership abilities
• Expert of the Day: Eddie Scarry from the Washington Examiner says Trump's performance at Putin summit sends media into a tailspin

Daily Show Prep - Monday July 16, 2018

• News media go nuts over Trump-Putin news conference, Trump wants 'to see the server'
• Putin denies having compromising info on Trump
• Schumer slams the press conference
• John Brennan: Trump's press conference 'treasonous,' and impeachable offense
• Congressmen Issa, Rohrabacher stand by Trump
• Russian woman indicted on conspiracy charge
• National Review: Mueller politicized the indictment of 12 Russians
• Putin accuses businessman of funneling $400 mil to Hillary campaign
• Businessman fires back at Putin
• Ron Paul predicts 'biggest bubble in the history of mankind and it's going to burst'
• Lisa Page returns to Capitol Hill for second day of grilling
• Socialist Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez says capitalism will 'not always exist'
• British caver considering legal action against Elon Musk after 'pedo guy' tweet
• Claim: Sex robots fueling rise in sex addiction
• The America TV series Phil was talking about
• Expert of the Day: Steven Nelson of the Washington Examiner talks about internal FBI survey that shows plummeting faith in Bureau leadership

Daily Show Prep - Friday July 6, 2018

• Record number employed in June, 10th record for Trump
• Hispanic unemployment hits another record low
• Dems blast Trump's 'reckless' agenda
• Pence rips Dems over #AbolishICE
• Immigration top issue for voters
• Illegal suspected in Ohio teen rape captured in Texas
• Many on Wall Street want to sabotage Trump's economy
• Man who stole MAGA hat from teen arrested for theft
• Says the hat is like a KKK hood
• Man loses his job after questioning black family's right to use community pool
• Liberals #Walkaway from the Dems, founder refused service at camera store
• Trump offers Elizabeth Warren $1 million to prove Indian heritage
• London's mayor OKs 'Trump Baby' balloon to fly during president's visit
• SCOTUS nominee narrowed to three
• Pope warns climate change turning Earth into desert
• The hilarious 'Seattle Tourism ad'
• Expert of the Day: Dan Perkins says the gas price problem is simple. It's all about the rig count

Daily Show Prep - Thursday July 5, 2018

• Scott Pruitt resigns as EPA chief
• Judge tosses lawsuit alleging Trump-Russia collusion
• Trump's SCOTUS list down to three
• Wanna bet on it?
• Man rips MAGA hat from teen's head at burger restaurant
• Attacker fired from his job
• Facebook flags Declaration of Independence as hate speech
• 74 percent prefer capitalism over socialism
• The 'America' TV series Phil talked about
• NY socialist candidate called for tax cuts when she ran a business
• CNN host asks, "Are we living through a national emergency?"
• Trump demands illegals be turned away at border
• Protestor climbs Statue of Liberty base, Liberty Island evacuated
• Woman is a Congolese immigrant with an apparent screw loose
• DNA tests being done on illegal children to match with parents
• Border Patrol arrests MS-13 gang members
• Woman separated from 2-year-old after smuggling 52 pounds of meth
• Oil could plummet amid price chaos
• Another analysis shows James Hansen was wrong about global warming
• Stormy Daniels' lawyer now mulling presidential run
• Media ignore Imran Awan being found guilty
• Liberal broadcaster Ed Schulz dead at 64
• Walmart takes heat as it removes 'Impeach Trump' t-shirts from website
• BSNBC's Joy Reid wrongly urges Twitter mob to attack innocent grandmother
• Scarlett Johansson faces backlash for playing transgender
• Miss Spain makes history as first transexual to win in prelims
• Kim Dotcom loses New Zealand extradition appeal
• Mom shoots carjacker in head after he tries to steal car with toddlers inside
• Two hurt by celebratory gunfire
• Chick-fil-A tops with customers in new survey
• How the wrong Statue of Liberty ended up on a postage stamp
• Expert of the Day: HHS spent 500 hours babysitting congressmen while they could've been helping the migrant children in their care

Daily Show Prep - Tuesday July 3, 2018

• Trump gives illegals with children two choices: Leave with your kids or leave without them
• Left chastises BernMe for not embracing #AbolishICE
• UC Berkeley tells students how to prepare for ICE raids
• Andrea Mitchell cites wrong law in attack on White House
• Indianapolis church 'detains' Jesus, Joseph, and Mary in fence
• House committee subpoenas Peter Strzok to testify in public
• EPA head Pruitt harassed at restaurant
• NEA cutting its budget by $28 million after Janus ruling
• Liberals attack potential SCOTUS nominee over her Christianity
• Walmart is selling 'Impeach Trump' t-shirts
• #BoycottWalmart launched on Twitter
• Senate Intel committee found no evidence of Trump/Russia collusion
• Rep. Jim Jordan accused of knowing about sexual abuse when a wrestling coach
• Body cam shows Vegas police not engaging Mandalay Bay shooter
• Liberal Starbucks needs 'racial equity overhaul,' diversity advisors say
• China develops laser gun
• Investigators broaden probe of Facebook
• Richard Branson: America should give out free cash to fix income inequality
• Actor Seth Rogen blasts Twitter CEO over verifying white supremacists
• Medical association pulls convention from San Fran over safety concerns
• Man wants to tow iceberg to Cape Town to alleviate water shortage 
• Greenpeace activists crash drone into nuclear plant
• Boston's Duck Boat tour spots body
• Rand Paul wants to defund study of effects of cocaine on quails' sex lives
• Expert of the Day: Eddie Scarry from the Washington Examiner on the EPA's Scott Pruitt and his scandals

Daily Show Prep - Monday July 2, 2018

• ICE Director: We don't separate families, Border Patrol is in charge of that
• Concentration camp survivor has a message for people who think America runs its own
• Former teacher accused of pulling gun at anti-ICE protest
• FBI arrests man for planning Fourth of July attack in Cleveland
• Al Gore exploits heat to scare people about global warming
• Illegal, not global warming, starts dozens of wildfires in Colorado
• Capital Gazette says it'll never forget being called 'enemy of the people' by Trump
• Will Trump release SPR oil reserves to drive down gas prices?
• IG report says Lynch-Bill Clinton meeting was not by chance
• CNBC obsessed with how much Trump's personal assistant makes
• LWM salivating over possible Cohen turn on Trump
• Reconquistador elected president of Mexico, watch out for the stampede to America
• 'Working class' primary winner Ocasio-Cortez actually grew up in wealthy suburb
• Weinstein facing life in prison after new charges
• Restaurant manager who refused service to MAGA hat-wearer is fired
• Seattle bans plastic straws, utensils
• Boys found alive in cave in Thailand after 9 days
• Poster boy for fake news exits ABC News
• Andy Dick charged with sexual battery
• Woman discovered alive in morgue fridge
• Expert of the Day: Brad Thor talks about his new thriller, Spy Master